Unravel Cancer: Experiences with family battling cancer: Michael Joseph Krupa (August 4th, 1968

28 February 2011

16:40 Michael Joseph Krupa (August 4th, 1968 - February 17th, 2011)

After a tremendous battle against cancer, and horrific pain, my brother Mickey passed away. Below is the eulogy I gave at his memorial services on February 21st, 2011. There was easily 150 people there, filling the room and beyond with love & good cheer, despite the sadness. I was lucky enough to hear stories about my brother that painted an even more prolific picture of him in my mind. Now, I can only hope that I can carry this bright spark in my heart to all those I meet, just like he did. He would have wanted me to live up to my potential in this way. Thank you, Mickey.

--Your Little Sister

First, a few announcements:

1) My mom sends her regrets that she was unable to come. But I know your attendance and outpouring of support for Mickey & his family would touch her greatly. Thank you for that.

2) I'd like to talk next about the sheet with markers at the table. I'm going to be travelling on a long trip, starting this summer. I asked Mickey what peaks he would climb if he was still able. We agreed on a list of 11 peaks, throughout the Pacific Coast of both North & South America. So, leave a message to Mickey on the sheet, and it'll be cut into 11 pieces. I'll leave a piece at the summit of each peak. As many of us can attest, sometimes the people that inspire us the most, are our next door neighbors, our football coaches, our siblings, or our ski instructors. So, thanks in advance for participating in this journey, dedicated to Mickey, and my luckiness to have him as brother.

From there, I'd like to add, as I grew older, I was able to appreciate my brother, Mickey. He was the one who wasn't afraid to break away, and carve out a really fantastic life for himself. He showed me how to live a life of joy, and share that with a community. This gave me confidence to strike out on my own path.

That's not to say every moment was great. There were many farts in the face, destroyed forts, and tickle torture sessions, to be sure.

But, no matter what, I feel the same as most of you feel: Mickey always wanted the best for everyone. I didn't just lose a brother; like you, I lost a friend. A friend that knew me my whole life!

As someone looking from outside this community in, I sincerely want to thank you all for being such great friends to Mickey, and encouraging him through this difficult battle, just like he encouraged you. Thanks for enriching his life, just like he enriched yours.

With that, I leave you with Mickey's last thoughts on Legacy. When asked what legacy meant to him, Mickey responded with these 4 things that make up a positive legacy. Thanks to Cassie for being scribe:

Legacy: What is legacy?
It means something left behind. What do you want that to be?
1. The Golden Rule: Do unto others as you would have them do unto you. It seems so simple, but very few people live by that, though we all want to.
2. Have fun! People shouldn't deny themselves of having fun. Make sure it's a part of your life.
3. Be kind, both to people and animals. It's very important to be kind to animals.
4. Robert Frost's poem The Road Not Taken. Think of me in this regard, particularly the unbelievable climbing trips to Ecuador, Peru and Bolivia. We're all afraid to die, but to do those kinds of things, you have to be willing to defy death.

The Road Not Taken

Two roads diverged in a yellow wood,
And sorry I could not travel both
And be one traveler, long I stood
And looked down one as far as I could
To where it bent in the undergrowth;

Then took the other, as just as fair,
And having perhaps the better claim
Because it was grassy and wanted wear,
Though as for that the passing there
Had worn them really about the same,

And both that morning equally lay
In leaves no step had trodden black.
Oh, I marked the first for another day!
Yet knowing how way leads on to way
I doubted if I should ever come back.

I shall be telling this with a sigh
Somewhere ages and ages hence:
Two roads diverged in a wood, and I,
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference.

With that I'd like to propose a toast, “Long Live Mickey, in our hearts always.”

*clink*

Labels: cancer death, grief, love, Mickey Krupa, siblings

Breathe.

I'm a 30-something professional woman who's mother & brother were both diagnosed with Grade 3 Astrocytoma tumors within about a week of each other. My mother's tumor is in her brain, and my brother's tumor is in his spinal cord, causing him to lose feeling in his arms & legs. These writings are about my experiences dealing with them, coping, loving them, loving myself, and living my life knowing that they are both dying. I hope you find inspiration and courage from my writings to help you get through whatever is going on in your life.